You are terrible. It has been quite some time since I found one that was worth even having a conversation with. I question in many cases if you actually obtain any testosterone at all. You see, I am an old fashioned girl. I enjoy some of the fruits of the women's suffrage movement, like my education and right to vote. However, for the most part, I like my men to be of the stronger, rougher, tougher end of the spectrum. Alas, fate has only brought me to you. You, who jump up from the couch in a tizzy screaming in a high pitched voice "puppies!!!!" unable to get your door open fast enough. You, who doesn't like blood and gory movies. Who am I to watch horror movies with and hold me in their strong arms? Not you it seems.
I am scared of snakes and spiders. Will you be able to kill them for me? Will you, in a manly and loving fashion, be able to laugh at me freaking out and screaming from a snake as you save me from it? I don't think so. That all being said, you must know.
Liking art, being well educated, having a soft or sensitive side. These should all not come at the cost of your basic manly duties. There are women out there that crave to feel little, and even in the smallest sense feeble and cared for.
Yes I would like to be taken out and treated special. No I do not want to walk around with you to stores while you run errands less then a month into dating. A reminder boys, women get hormonal. Man up and realize that and just let our crazy, once a month, antics go. You and I both know that it's worth it. I understand that some of you may have had your balls chopped of from a previous relationship. Maybe you've been cheated on? Lied to? Well we all have. Pain is the nature of being a human. We all must over come it. You will benefit from the long run and it will make you stronger. In your new relationship with me though, leave that crazy, my ex emotionally cheated on me, cut herself, got in arguments, have been broken up for 5 years drama at the door. It's perfectly ok to talk about these things. As a woman I will listen with a loving and open heart. Then, I don't want to hear about it again. I want to hear about me. I want to hear about your likes and dislikes. I want to get to know you! Not your crazy ex girlfriends.
Since this is an open letter I don't intend to end it. I do however need to say this; shoot a gun. It feels damn good. You don't have to kill anything. Shoot a piece of paper. If you are terrified of guns or think they are horribly wrong, thats fine. But your missin out on some serious release of tension. Guns don't kill people, people kill people.
Check out this great website for references